Intuitive sex. It’s something we all need to practice more — and start talking about — because let’s face it, it can sound a little obscure without context.

For some people, sex is like brushing their teeth: you do it twice a day, it’s part of your routine — it’s not that deep! However, at ILO Wellness, we believe that sex is so much more than just an act. It’s a way of enhancing our lives and maximising our overall health and wellbeing.

What is intuitive sex, you ask?
It’s the internal conversation you have with yourself before getting down and jiggy. The most important thing to remember? You’re always in control of your body and how you use it. Ask yourself these vital questions:

• “Do I really feel like doing this?”

• “Who am I doing this for — me, or them?”

If you’re not feeling it, here’s how to change the vibe without killing the passion or hurting anyone’s feelings:

Suggest a sensual massage – Using the luxurious, mouth-watering ILO Wellness Fondle Oil or Melt Massage Candle, you can shift the mood toward a more relaxing, blissful kind of intimacy. Don’t underestimate the power of touch and how deeply it can connect you to your partner. Get them to return the favour — and who knows? You might just change your mind after all.

Make them wait – There’s nothing more tantalising than a healthy tease. Rejection doesn’t have to be blunt or cold — it can be playful and exciting, creating that push-pull dynamic that keeps desire alive. Instead of saying, “Not tonight…” or “I’m not in the mood,” try: “I’ve got something really special for you — but you’ll have to wait until later.”

Bring out your ILO Wellness pleasure toys – Sometimes, the idea of partnered sex can feel overwhelming, or maybe you just CBF with all the jumping and humping. Using an adult toy can be the perfect middle ground — you still receive pleasure, but without the physical effort that comes with it.

Bottom line: Listen to your body in the moment. You always have the right to say no — and nothing feels sexier than honouring yourself and being in tune with what you truly need.

ILO Wellness x

Written by Margaux Dalgleish