Intuitive sex. It’s something we all need to practice more and start talking about, as it sounds a little obscure without any context. For some people, sex can be like brushing your teeth. You do it twice a day and it’s part of your routine – it’s not that deep! However, and for our community, we can agree that ‘sex’ is so much more than just an act. It’s a way of enhancing our life and maximising our overall health and wellbeing. 

What is intuitive sex I hear you ask? It’s the internal conversation you have with yourself before you’re about to get down and jiggy. The important thing to remember is that you’re always in control of your body and how you use it, so ask yourself these vital questions: 

“Do I really feel like doing this?” 

“Who am I doing this for? Me or them?” 

If you’re not feeling it, here’s how to change the outcome of the situation without killing the passion or hurting their feelings. 

• Suggest a sensual massage – Using the luxurious mouth-watering Ilo Wellness Fondle Oil or Melt Massage Candle, change the direction of intimacy into a more relaxing and blissful experience. Don’t underestimate how powerful touch can be and how this makes you connect with your sexual partner. Get them to return the favour, and who knows…you may change your mind after all! 
• Make them wait – there is nothing more tantalising than a healthy tease. Rejection doesn’t always have to be blunt and cold. It can be said in a playful and exciting way to create that healthy pull and push that keeps passion alive. Instead of saying “Not tonight…” or “I’m not in the mood”, you could say, “I have something really special for you, but you’ll have wait until later” etc. 
• Bring out your Ilo Wellness pleasure toys! Sometimes the thought of sex with another body involved can feel overwhelming, or we just CBF for all the jumping and humping involved. Using an adult toy can be a nice middle ground if you feel like receiving pleasure, without all the physical exertion that comes with. 

Bottom line is to listen to your body in that moment. Nothing feels sexier than respecting your body and being in tune with what it needs.

Ilo Wellness x

Written by Margaux Dalgleish